duh

I feel like a lot of people are taking me for granted.

I may be the witness to a huge huge potentially gigantic scandalous scam right now...but everyone is just looking at me like im a third wheel.

Im used to it though...third wheel, fifth wheel, orgy. Whatever...basically in the end im going to get the last laugh.

Moving on.

Life is rocky. 2009 is gay. My boyfriend cheated on me.

In a nutshell.

New Years was aweful. I was soberish. Peter was wasted. I found out he cheated on me twice..."Thats nice...I did it too..." way to love someone...right? Were on the rocks. Ish. I feel like Im in love with him and hes just cruising along...weve talked about moving in...he wants to...for relationship reasons...not just to get out from his parents place. But thats a hueg huge huge step. Gigantismo. Ive done it once before...for all the wrong reasons and I just dont want to fuck up a good thing (any more so than i already have) I think were doing a little better now? But with the Inauguration and shit going down hes really busy with work...I honestly havent seen him for weeks. Its killing me. Its so hard to be in love with someone and not see them. Im a mess emotinally right now. And the fact that an old flame just randomly pops back up at this point in time is NOT helping.

...and im still looking for a job. Ive had a trial at two places..one a spa, one a salon. Lets be honest...the spa didnt work out. They hated me. I hated them. It smelled like farts in there.

The salon was a lot better. It was something I was used to...great people, great fun. Im hoping they liked me.

So heres to 2009. May you be filled with percocet, vicodin, valium, and adderall to numb the pain! God damn 2000 fucking 9.